How to Find Patience to Endure Infertility

Struggling with infertility can lead to restlessness, discontentment, and anger. Whether it’s listening to well-meaning family members prodding, ‘When are you going to have kids?’, concern about your biological clock ticking, or watching your friends have children, impatience can brew.

God has provided a way to help you be content in all circumstances (Philippians 4:11) and persevere with strength. It’s His gift of patience. Let’s chat about it.

The Building Blocks for Patience

We have all experienced the desire for immediate results. Our culture dictates we take charge, have objectives, devise a plan, and then tackle it to get what we want as soon as possible. 

I had checklists in life and found satisfaction in taking control: funding my degrees, climbing the corporate ladder, traveling the world, having fun outdoors, and marrying ‘Mr. Right.’ I thought I had mastered the formula for life. 

And then came infertility—my plan for having children on my timeline did not work. There was no indication of how long it might take, which was maddening for a goal-oriented person like myself.  Patience was not one of my virtues!

As my frustration mounted, my mother suggested the ultimate tools for dealing with my situation. She asked, “Are you praying every day? Have you opened the Bible I sent you?” 

Pray daily? Read the Bible? It sounded like an overdose of religion. I was too busy.  My plate was full of my husband, career and activities. My mock-10 pace did not allow much time to be with God. 

Per her suggestion, I took the dusty Bible off the shelf and read about God’s mission through Jesus in the Gospel of Luke. His words reeled me in. He was there for me. For the first time in my life, I recognized the need to spend time daily with God in the Holy Bible and prayer.

The Season for Developing Patience is Upon You

Experiencing infertility presents an enormous opportunity to build a reservoir of godly patience. Would you bother to pursue it if you were not in a long-suffering state? 

God will strengthen you with perseverance. Patient people must be willing to endure suffering well and draw closer to God. He is waiting for you to turn to Him.  

When we are committed to Jesus, the Spirit of God dwells in us and deposits the seeds of patience. Are you struggling with restlessness? Pursuing the truth in the Bible, communicating with the Lord in prayer, and listening for prompts on what God wants us to do contribute to the growth of patience.

…those who wait for the Lord
Will gain new strength
They will mount up with wings like eagles
They will run and not get tired
They will walk and not become weary. 
(Isaiah 40:31 NIV)

The more time you spend with God, the more patient you will become. Patience slows you down to see God’s best unfold. It provides the space for your character to be fine-tuned, and allows other gifts from God to bloom in you—like love, joy, peace, kindness, goodness, gentleness, faithfulness, and self-control.

To persevere in your infertility journey, commit to waiting on God and ask Him to help you build patient resolve.

You can pray now to the God of patience in the Holy Bible:

Thank you, Lord God, for waiting patiently for me to pursue You. You are compassionate and gracious, slow to anger, abounding in love. (Psalm 103:8 NIV) I want to deepen my relationship with You. Help me to be still before You, discover the richness of Your Word, and find joy in prayer. 

Develop long-enduring patience in me as I desire to obtain what seems so easy for others—the conception of human life. Relieve my stress and frustration. Prompt me to say: “STOP in the name of Jesus” to negative, defeating thoughts and replace them with thankful words and praise to You. Take away my self-imposed timelines and desire for control. I surrender my fertility to You.

Your Scripture says that You act on behalf of those who wait(Psalm 64:4 NIV). Hear my cry and lift me out of the mud and mire; set my feet on a rock and give me a firm place to stand. (Psalm 40:2 NIV) 

Let my heart take courage and give me the will to wait on You.(Psalm 27:14 NIV) Bless me with fortitude, contentment, and strength. You promise in Your Scriptures that I will not be disappointed or ashamed when I trust in You. (Psalm 25:1-3 NIV)I offer up this prayer in the name of Jesus. Amen.

Moving Forward…

Ask yourself this:

Am I spending dedicated time with God each day? Have I opened my heart to receive His gift of patience, or am I being consumed with frustration?

Try this challenge:

Set a time each day to spend with God. Start by reading the Bible or do a Bible study 10-15 minutes per day. Begin with one of the gospels—Matthew, Mark, Luke or John. What words or phrases address your situation?

Share this link with a friend who might benefit from this post.

Peace be with you until next time, Kimberly

P.S. Did you have the chance to read the last post on hope? How about asking for the FREE guide “4 Steps to Overcome Infertility Fears and Worries”?

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