What about Foster Care?
In their sixth year of infertility, the Lord allowed my friends Lindsey and Trevor Sides (L&T) to be involved in foster care. Their church had partnered with the Department of Human Services to find a home for children whose parents could not safely care for them.
First, L&T committed to praying about it. Trevor read and shared a book with Lindsey called Adoption by Russell Moore, which she says “took me from wanting only domestic infant adoption to recognizing that Jesus has children who need love like those in foster care, older children, and those of different races. “My heart opened to receive whoever He would bring us.” They got an email about a little boy who needed a home the next day.
Then, being in one accord before God, the couple agreed to pursue foster care.
Have you considered helping God’s children through foster care?
With May being National Foster Care Month, consider the estimated 360,000 children in foster care who need safe and loving care. Let’s chat about what foster care is like and how you might be able to help.
“The Lord formed our family through foster care.”
Lindsey and Trevor enthusiastically provided foster care for a two-year-old boy, Jonathan. They aimed to give the love, support, and compassion he needed along the way.
Jonathan gravitated naturally to Trevor, and his engaging, talkative personality resembled Lindsey’s. She shares, “He couldn’t have been more like us than if we’d had him naturally, and we loved spending time with him.” These joys were partnered with challenges. Court-ordered “home visits” with Jonathan’s biological parents caused him emotional strain and nightmares. The couple faced many nights of interrupted sleep, and slept next him to provide peace and comfort. Lindsey could see God shaping them through the process and growing them for this calling.
Eventually, the agency’s goals for Jonathan changed from reuniting him with his bio family to L&T adopting him as their own. Lindsey and Trevor prayed for God’s will as they endured two years and several court hearings to get a final ruling. Finally, the court determined that termination of the biological parental rights was needed so that adoption would be possible.
Nothing is impossible with God (Luke 1:37)
Lindsey and Trevor were relieved and thanked God for this incredible opportunity to love one of His children permanently. After the adoption, they took a year off from pursuing anything related to fertility, foster care, or adoption. When they were ready again, they worked with a non-county agency to pursue foster-to-adopt, praying God would bring them their future children. As a result, they were matched with two sisters whom they adopted.
“The Lord knew these kids needed us and each other.”
Autumn’s quiet grace and Daisy’s joy and humor complemented Jonathan’s chatty nature. The three kids melded together, unified by their ‘similar histories of difficulty’ experienced before joining their ‘forever family.’
“Foster care has been the highest calling and blessing to our family that we ever imagined.”
God’s unexpected plan with foster care led Trevor and Lindsey to adopt three kids from hard places to build their family. As bonding and attachment are built over time, God has granted the children a safe and secure family culture. T&L embrace godly love and wisdom to make this a reality as they face complex, unanticipated challenges.
Lindsey says those called to foster care or adoption should be aware of behavioral or medical issues that can arise at any developmental stage. It is vital to seek God’s strength and guidance through prayer, find support from friends and a foster/adoptive support group, and be involved in a local church. Trauma-informed counseling helps. “God provides everything we need.”
To sum it up, “These ‘sufferings for Christ’s sake’ grow you as a parent, and although it’s a steep learning curve, it produces endurance, character, and hope that ‘does not put us to shame’,” Lindsey adds as she quotes Romans 5:3-5, “because God’s love has been poured into our hearts through the Holy Spirit who has been given to us.”
You can pray now for the God of the Holy Bible to help you discern your role in foster care.
Lord God, Your Word tells us to “Learn to do right, seek justice, defend the oppressed, and take up the cause of the fatherless… (Isaiah 1:17 NIV)
Jesus said, “…whoever welcomes one such child in my name welcomes me.” (Matthew 18:5 NIV) We want to show Your compassion and love as You call us. According to Your will, please show my husband and me how to be involved in foster care or find ways to support and bless those who are fostering or adopting kids.
Give us the courage to reach out and give Your children your love, protection, and sense of belonging, whether temporary or long-term. Prompt us to support others who have this calling. We ask all this in the name of Jesus. Amen.
Moving forward…
Ask yourself this:
What churches or agencies in my community have ministries that reach out to foster children? Have I asked God about His opportunities for my husband and me to minister to His children and others?
Consider this challenge:
Support the cause of National Foster Care Month through hands-on or financial support to help families in foster care and equip foster care children to transition into adulthood.
Please share this post with someone who could benefit from it.
How can I pray for you? Email me at hello@infertilityprayerresource.com.
Peace be with you,
Kimberly
P.S. You won’t want to miss the following posts that will equip you for your journey:
- How is Forgiveness tied to Infertility and Mother’s Day?
- What Decision has the Most Impact on Your Infertility Journey?
- 4 Ways to Take Your Eyes off Yourself and Focus on God
- Why try Fasting for Spiritual Renewal and Guidance?